Picture, if you will, a slight breeze trying to muster the strength to ruffle your hair as you glide deftly through the wilds of Chinese traffic at a cool 35 km/hr. The slight buzz beneath you hums into your thighs with all the power of an electric pencil sharpener.

For only a few thousand kuai you’ve upped your rank on the food chain of China’s roads by an exponential factor. No longer are you bound by your two feet, nor your heart beat. You are born again; born to ride!

That’s right folks, I’ve bought an e-bike!

Actually, I bought…